NASCAR driver Kyle Busch dies at 41 after a sudden illness, an abrupt end to a career that featured 2 Cup Series championships and more wins than any other driver. Crazy this was just a week ago. RIP to a legend.
Knicks win at MSG to take a 2-0 lead in what can only be described as the Josh Hart legacy game. I want this shirt bad. In the West, the series heads to San Antonio, where Carter Bryant hopefully has a more private place to pee.
Stephen Colbert has his final show, as an insane list of celebrities
who couldn’t get Knicks ticketscame out to show support. Lukewarm take: he’ll run for President in ‘28 and he might even win (he could’ve in ‘08.)SpaceX will retry launch of their upgraded starship today after scrapping their launch yesterday seconds before it was scheduled to go live. This may be the second most important launch for the company after their IPO, which could go as high as $2 trillion, making Elon the first trillionaire to have this body.
Survivor 50 results were spoiled by host Jeff Probst moments before it aired during live finale. I'd tell you guys more info, but I’m like 3 episodes behind and can’t do any more research without spoiling it for myself. My bad.
Happy Memorial Day Weekend. To celebrate, we’re giving 20% off all our stuff site-wide. Snag yourself something nice for the summer (this one will do quite well.)
WHAT ELSE IS GOOD
TSA will allow you to bring a whole rotisserie chicken onto an airplane, which might be the move of the year. If you can keep it tidy and share with your seat mate, I’ll allow it.
It’s definitely not as gross as the guy who make an entire roasted garlic shrimp dish in an airport bathroom
Shoutout to the landlord who went to make repairs on a tenant’s apartment while they were in the hospital and then got caught on camera having sex in that tenant’s living room. To be fair, 1) it technically is his home and 2) he was very horny. Understandable.
Oh he was going to town. Good lord
Let’s give Scream 6’s marketing team their flowers. I’m the world’s leading expert on movie popcorn buckets and even I’m impressed by this bong-shaped apparatus.
Not totally sure how you’re supposed to eat out of this, but that’s besides the point
The new perfect woman just dropped and it’s a lovely lady who goes by “Lawn Queen” that just set a world record by mowing a football field sized lawn in under 15 minutes.
Is there a Mr. Lawn Queen? I’d like to throw my hat in the ring.
I actually support Hooters trying to become more ‘family-friendly’ and ending suggestive waitress uniforms. They legit have fantastic wings & I’m tired of being shamed for going. I’ll also be re-subscribing to Playboy. They have excellent articles.
Hooters is for all ages. Never forget that.
The 4th of July may have been saved, as Joey Chestnut will officially be allowed to compete while on probation for a misdemeanor battery charge. Look, if you can suck down 70+ hot dogs in 10 minutes, you’re allowed to go goblin mode sometimes.
He can do no wrong in my book.
Who Are You Buying a Beer For?
DOC’S LOCKS
Let’s make bank this weekend with Glue Guy and Dr. Locks. Tap in for a full breakdown.
SIX-LEGGER FRIDAYS: 6 picks. One parlay. +1510 odds. Only way to start off MDW.
Spurs vs. Thunder: Thunder ML. It’s looking like Thunder in 6. Don’t quote me on that.
Avalanche vs. Knights: Avs ML. Lock of the century. Scheduled win.
Phillies vs. Guardians: Phillies ML. Sanchez hasn’t given up a run in like a month. Easy.
Nationals vs. Braves: Braves ML. Easy peasy. Don’t overthink it.
Angels vs. Rangers: Rangers ML. Rocking with DeGromm. What’s better than that?
Rockies vs. D-Backs: D-Backs ML. Fade the Rockies on a Friday night. As always.
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THE LAST PERSON YOU HOOKED UP WITH DIES
David Cross has finally hit the peak of his career and achieved any actor’s lifelong goal: appearing in a long form, Almost Friday TV sketch. Congratulations, sir. Well-deserved.
STUFF TO CLICK WHEN YOU’RE BORED
Every single drink at the Renaissance Faire was sampled by Willy and Rusty (plus a crew of the extended Almost Friday universe) and electric content followed. As is tradition.
Read this on your lunch break: The Strange Pre-History of AI Slop.
A Complete Breakdown of ‘The Office’ basketball game is an incredible video. Well worth the watch.
Wait, is the Car Crash conspiracy actually real? Great long form. (Remove Paywall here.)
Did people actually think that Oz the Mentalist was doing actual magic? Sure he got caught once, but he’s batting like 99.9999% by now.
‘What I Learned About Billionaires at Jeff Bezos’s Retreat’ is a great insight into what the lizard people are up to these days. (Remove paywall here.)
‘Guy with 7 DUIs watches movies with drunk driving scenes’ is so goddam good. Fantastic work, Garrett.
It’s Friday of a long weekend. Fuck it. Final 3:39 of Game 7 of the 2016 NBA Finals. Peak.
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