The Daily Friday: Monday 1/13

It’s another week in paradise. Here’s everything you need to know to sound smart.

1. California wildfires continue, as concern grows about expected wind increase this week. Shoutout to the first responders and the reinforcements from Canada, Mexico and across the country. Stay safe 🤝

2. Zuck goes on Rogan and says that companies lack masculine energy while taking shots at Apple. Dude went from being a dweeb to learning MMA, dressing like Drake and doing this stuff. I know a midlife crisis when I see one.

3. ‘Rawdog’ voted the word of 2024 by the American Dialect society. This just confirms what we’ve always known: Strider Wilson is the most influential man of the modern era. They need to make a statue of him at every airport.

4. Timothee Chalamet will host SNL and also be the musical guest, the first non-professional musician to do so in 30 years. Guy is a walking W. Save some for the rest of us, dude. He better recreate this video.

5. Robbie Williams biopic ‘A Better Man’ flops in opening weekend, brings in $1.1M against a $110M budget. Who could’ve have guessed a movie with a CGI monkey playing a musician no one in America knows would bomb??

MONDAY MILLER LITE TELEPHONE

When the Miller Lite Telephone calls, will you be brave enough to answer?

One of the coolest things I’ve ever seen. Every detail is perfect, down to the anatomically correct shotgun hole where the cord plugs in. We used to build things in this country. Let’s get back to that.

Almost makes me want to bring back landlines just to make a Friday Beers version of this. Imagine calling up the squad on that sucker and putting together a dudes-only pregame for the ages (none of the 3 girls you know responded.) The stuff of dreams.

NFL: AJ Brown gets early jump start on his “read more books” New Year’s resolution, knocks out a few pages of ‘Inner Excellence’ on the sidelines during an Eagles W.

Shoutout to Commander’s kicker Zane Gonzalez. That level of OCD would cripple me but he’s channeling it to bang game-winning FGs. Respect. PS - your hair looks great ❤️

Bills and Ravens dominate and we are going to get an all-time matchup next week. Winner gets MVP.

Never change, George Pickens. Never change. (Bill Belichick would absolutely murder him and/or ban him from speaking ever again.)

NCAAF: Jack Sawyer is an absolute god, ices OSU win and national championship spot with a late scoop and score. Come a longgg way since the Michigan debacle.

NBA: Jalen Brunson dropped 44 points at MSG in just 28 minutes of playing time during Knicks blowout win. And he’ll still get left off the Olympics team.

UFC: Frontier Airlines kicks Khabib off of flight due to misunderstanding about emergency exit row. That’s the bravest flight attendant of all time. Dude is terrifying.

SOCO MIXES WITH EVERYTHING

Made from a one-of-a-kind blend of fruit and spices, Souther Comfort Whiskey is the ORIGINAL ready-for-anything spirit. Satisfying on its own or ideal in a mixed drink, SoCo is easy to enjoy however you drink it, and whoever you drink it with. 

When it comes to SoCo cocktails, find your comfort zone… you don’t have to be ‘fancy.’ Personally, I like to keep it simple with a SoCo Lemonade. Nothing hits the spot after a long week of working not-that-hard quite like mixing up a few of those SoCo Lem-Os, putting my feet up, and cruising right into the weekend.

No matter the moment, Southern Comfort is ready-for-anything: packed with flavor, mixes with anything, and easy to drink! We challenge all you out there to find your comfort zone – try out some Southern Comfort mix drinks and send us your favorites. We’ll include the best ones in the next newsletter 👀👀

*Southern Comfort, Spirit Whiskey with Natural Flavors and Caramel Color, 35% and 40% Alc/Vol, Sazerac Company, Louisville, KY

WHAT ELSE IS GOOD

Sydney Thomas says that an SEC coach slid into her DMs recently and it’s absolutely Lane Kiffin. I’ve never been more confident of anything in my entire life.

Nice try, but this “bear“ at a Chinese Zoo is absolutely just a person dressed in a bear costume who wanted free zoo tickets. Kind of a genius cost-saving move tbh.

Indian student sets record by building world’s smallest vacuum cleaner out of a pen. Finally. Something small enough to vacuum my penis-hole with. That thing is filthy.

MONDAY MOVE

Live look at me on my morning commute today. Hope ya’ll don’t mind.

If I’ve learned one thing in life, it’s that pockets can be for anything. Even full loaves of bread. This guy is using every available storage resource available to him and I’ll never knock that. Kudos.

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STUFF TO CLICK WHEN YOU’RE BORED TODAY

• Cam Newton goes on Special Forces show and proves he’s still an absolute beast. One of the biggest freaks of nature of all time.

• Read this on your lunch break: An Investigation into the Jellycat Crime Wave.

• Fuck it. 10 minutes of Mike Vrabel Pats highlights, in honor of him getting the HC job. One of one.

• The story of the Twin Bandits, identical twin brothers who pulled off a series of bank heists, just came across my desk and is an electric read.

• The 2025 Golden Globes point to an Oscar’s shakeup. Here’s why.

• It’s Monday. Time to grind out some Wilt Chamberlain 73 point game footage to put yourself in an excellence mindset. Let’s have one.