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The Knicks win the NBA Cup, their first title in over 50 years. Gotta give a shoutout to Josh Hart: this is the only way to celebrate a title. Congrats to Stephen A Smith for finally looking up from his solitaire game to celebrate.
Lawmakers in Mexico break out into massive brawl after a debate spiraled out of control. Hell yes. Let’s ditch the filibuster and bring brawls into American politics. Like 80% of them would die from a heart attack, but them’s the breaks.
Warner Bros rejects proposal from Paramount, citing ‘significant risks’ with the hostile takeover & that they believe
Dad’s planNetflix’s proposal was better. Real ones learned this last week from the world’s only news source.Slop is crowned the Word of the Year by Merriam Webster Dictionary, joining ‘67’, ‘rage-bait,’ ‘vibe-coding,’ and ‘para-social’ as the winners from the other major dictionaries. Seems about right. The future is looking very bright.
PornHub hit with a major security breach, as hackers steal viewing data for over 200M premium members. Release it. If someone is so shameless they’re paying for Pornhub Premium, I don’t think they’re gonna care if anyone finds out they watch hours of Lois Griffin hentai.
As we wrap up the year and start to look towards 2026, we here at Daily Friday HQ have one goal: being the best thing that hits your inbox every MWF.
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THE DAILY FRIDAY AWARDS
ANNOUNCEMENT: it’s time to celebrate all the things that made 2025 great. We’ll be rolling out our Daily Friday Awards on the newsletter and our podcast over the next two weeks, ending with our world famous Horny Awards (check out our 2023 and 2024’s winners) so get your little asses fired up for that. Enjoy.
BALD OF THE YEAR
Fuck going to Turkey for a hair refresh. This is the year that celebrities and society leaned in and decided to accept their flaws. To be brave. To be bold. To be bald.
The candidates for Bald Person of the Year are as follows….
Shave it off Johnny. It looks good.
Cynthia Erivio: for excellence in red carpet security
Pitbull: for excellence in spreading bald awareness to the haired community
Dwayne the Rock Johnson: for excellence in weight change and longest standing ovation.
Jeff Bezos: for his contributions to the space travel and meme community.
Vin Diesel: lifetime achievement award
HONORABLE MENTIONS:
Jaylen Brown: just embrace the bald and shave it off, brother. Can’t be having this.
Bald Ann Dowd: excellent Twitter follow, not actually bald in real life. Maybe next year, toots.
Johnny Sins: lifetime achievement award
Who Was the Bald of the Year?
CURSED SNACK FOOD INNOVATION OF THE YEAR
Science is an incredible thing. When used in the right away, we can create technological marvels. The Internet. Hot Tubs. The everything bagel.
When used in the wrong way, we can create monstrosities that defy the limits of reason and common sense. Things like this year’s nominees for Cursed Snack Foods…
Let’s celebrate last year’s winner, the Will Levis Mayo Perfume. The perfect product
Frida’s Breast Milk ice cream: actually shocked that Sydney Sweeney didn’t endorse and promote this product this year. I know at least Homelander or Nathan Fielder would be lining up to purchase
Papa John Garlic Bath Bomb: the start to any perfect date night and the ONLY way to scientifically prove your lover is not a vampire. Throw 4-5 of these into a big bath with some pork loin, carrots, and onions, wait 6 hours, and you’ve got yourself a pot roast.
Heinz Ketchup smoothie: am I crazy in thinking that this might actually be good??
9 volt battery flavored chips: this was created by a Netherland company to ‘capitalize on nostalgia.’ Finally, someone is capturing the feeling of licking a battery and jolting your entire body with tingly metallic sensations. Why is no one else doing this?
Progresso Soup Drops: these are chicken-noodle soup flavored lozenges for cold and flu season. If they don’t collab with Bowling for Soup for a catchy and inspiring jingle by the end of the quarter, I’ve lost all faith in Big Soup’s marketing teams.
What Was the Most Cursed Snack Food of 2025
The AI Insights Every Decision Maker Needs
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HUMP DAY HIPPO
This is the album art for one of the all-time bangers in human history - the Hippopotamus Polka. Truly slaps on so many levels. It's extremely fun to listen to and just march around your apartment. A staple of ANY holiday season.
Just when I think the hippo can't get any more impressive as a species, they go and pull off the Hippopotamus Polka and just stun me beyond belief.
A very minor note though - this is just not what a hippo looks like at all. Like, why is it's nose looking like that? Oh well, can't worry about that now. I'm bopping to a polka and have no worries on my mind.
STUFF TO CLICK WHEN YOU’RE BORED TODAY
It’s rare that you find a must-follow account, but I think I’ve stumbled across one here: a guy working on a master life of “Stuff that Rules” and lists 5 new things every day. That’s just my kind of content.
Read this on your lunch break: The Year 6 7 Ate Parents’ Minds
The trailer for Steven Spielberg’s new movie “Disclosure Day” just dropped and looks remarkable.
Just a reminder that a Tortured Mind: Beer vs. Wine is still one of the greatest pieces of art ever created.
I can’t believe Vanity Fair got so many White House insiders, including the Chief of Staff, to sit for this many interviews. Fascinating read.
It’s Hump Day. Enjoy 10 minutes of Randy Moss making catches that increasingly get more and more disrespectful.
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